Journal – Nov 28, 2018

I have not been good. It has been days since I’ve been out of bed or to the gym. I am too depressed to even move. She has a boyfriend and she spends the night with him. Oh she’ll have an excuse. It’ll be she stayed over Lauren’s to help with the baby while she works. But a little birdie told me that’s a lie. She fucks him almost every night. Dear God what did I do wrong? Where did I go wrong?

My God has forsaken me. I am alone in this world.

Oh grow up you asshole. There are plenty of people who have it worse than you. Buck up and be a man. Man the fuck up. Stop the fucking bellyaching and the goddamn crying. Grow up fuck face.

I haven’t slept more than 2 or 3 hours a night for days. Perhaps that is why I am so depressed. Dunno. Is it that or losing my wife to Jimmy Orr? Yes I know where she has run too. He has her pic in a heart on his facebook page. And first knowing that I got in trouble as well as the person who showed it to me. And she lied and said it’s because they’re close friends. Very close I would say.

Oh well. I am fucked anyway.

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