Dear God

Dear God,

It’s me again. I’m gonna try to stay in touch from now on.

Well You know I screwed up again. Big time. Ended up in the crisis center, sgsin. Spent two long weeks there. But You did it again. When I sought to take things in my own hands and end it for good you stepped in and said THAT AIN’T HAPPENIN’!

I don’t know whether to thank You or curse You.

Know this Father… I do love my family. I do. I never meant to hurt them. I just wasn’t thinking straight. You know how it was. All of a sudden I was crushed by the weight of what I’ve lost and I went a little, well OK more than a little, nuts.

I’m sorry isn’t good enough but it is all that I have. I know… tell it to my family. I have Lord. I have.

My once upon a time wife says You obviously have something planned for me or You wouldn’t keep seeing to it that I’m saved. Well if You do would You please let me know what it is? Before it’s too late.

God grant that I never undergo such crushing despair again. God grant me strength of mind and will and character and whatever else is needed to keep from ever going there again.

Thanks God. I appreciate it. BTW… say hi to Mary for me would You please? And thank her for me as well. You know we’ve always had a special affinity. Thank You for her too Lord.

You kept me alive now please give mt the strength and peace of mind to make it through the night unmedicated. You know my meds are locked in a safe that I no longer have a key to. Again my once upon a time wife will save the day and have someone open the safe for me but until then please grant that I stay strong. And safe. And while You’re at it please continue to look out for my family. You’ve blessed us all so much and we take that for granted. Thank you for those blessings Lord. And thank You for my family.

Well that’s all for now…


2 thoughts on “Dear God”

  1. What a beautiful prayer. Prayer is just talking to God. I’m sure he has a blog and he texts love right into our hearts. You still have a soft heart no matter what happened to you. You’ve gained nobility in staying strong in your faith through adversity. Hold on, when it gets the worst it can get, there’s only room for things to get better. It’s tough being a human. Too many feelings to deal with. Don’t go crazy. Fall in love with yourself instead. I’ll show you. When we start focusing on who and what we love, everything else falls into place. Don’t take any experience for granted. We learn the most spiritually through hard times. Being vulnerable is a good medicine to make you thankful for the good in our lives. I loved your prayer. It made me thankful.

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